Reminder: Don’t wait for your patterns to be ‘done’ to stop giving them power & control.
Fact: Patterns end when we fill our holes & remember our wholeness AND allow our kinky shadow side to be tickled & fulfilled
One of the bigger shadows I needed to face in the relationship space was my love for drama (hey, it’s fun )
For awhile there, nothing got me more excited than playing in the line of fire with narcissistic, abusive humans
They fought for me. Over & over. Never wanted to let me go. Wouldn’t let me go. Would die instead of let me go.
My kinky shadow side LOVED this.
So did the younger me after a childhood of abuse where it felt like no one protected or saved me.
It was a familiar drama that filled certain underdeveloped parts of my psyche AND certain brilliant kinky shadow parts of my psyche.
When I brought the unconscious to the conscious, & whole heartedly reveled in the danger for a bit...
I, eventually, no longer needed to...
“You’re so picky.
“You have really high expectations.
“That’s awfully specific, Julianne.
- outside feedback when I got super clear on the lover I wanted
Is this you? Or are you sort of wishy-washy?
Regardless, read on
When I wrote out my ideal partnership characteristics & experiences...
I was clear that I desired someone who would literally play dress up with me
I wanted a man that played in all of the realms
& ALL of the Erotic Blueprints - a Shapeshifter with strong Sensual/Energetics & Kink
(take the quiz in my bio to find out your Blueprint)
I was really clear on how I wanted this human to make me feel, & how I wanted to make them feel
Most people I told,
kinda gave me an eye roll like...
“Well, are you just gonna be single forever if you don’t find him?
“I hope you find him BUT, what happens when you find out your bar is set too high?
When did we forget WE are the creators of our reality in this holographic world?!
(You can have...
I used to say, ‘I love too hard & it gets me into trouble.’
But loving from a Whole Heart
won’t lead you into situations
where you self sacrifice & self abandon
This idea that I loved too hard & it got too dangerous, made me close my heart
Except it didn’t have to do with:
the bigness of my love or
the size of my heart.
It had to do with WHO
I was choosing to give it to.
Boundaries are expressions of love...
‘This is how I want to be loved’
’This is what feels good to me’
’This is what doesn’t feel good to me - & when something doesn’t feel good, I tend to close off & I don’t want to do that with you’
‘Are you open to loving me this way?’
Your people want to know how to love you!
They want you to feel good & be happy!
Boundaries make that possible
***Calling In Your Ideal Partners x Lovers*** workshop is on 5/29!
I’ll be guiding you through a cleansing ritual, & potent 5...
I got felt up by a police officer when I went to pick up Paul at the airport in Costa Rica
He was seemingly there to help me navigate
Except he sandwiched himself between the car door & drivers seat as I tried to get out
He was trying to ask me about the tattoos on my arms but didn’t speak much English
I tried to be nice, smile to his like of my ink, & quickly gather my things so I could go find Paul
When I turned my head, his hands were all over my upper body touching my tattoos, from my neck to my hands
I flinched, tried to pull away & end communication
We were in the back corner of the garage with no one around
As I tried to get out, my leg tattoo peeked through the slit of my skirt
And before I knew it, he was feeling my upper thigh & the band wrapped around it
I pulled away again, managed to end the conversation, get out of the car, lock the doors & head to the arrivals area
A few weeks later I was in a store in Sedona, & Paul was waiting for me in the car
Your mindset, body, heart & yoni are a damn g a r d e n
You don’t need to let anyone through that gate unless they perk up your flowers, in the way YOU like it
Over the years of tending to my garden...
I’d pull weeds, but then let them be right back planted by the same someone with a different face
I’d clean it up, spruce up my garden, & get my flowers all ready for the next show...
And then look back at the garden, & be like ‘how the f did you get in there?!’
Round & round we’d go
It can be fun to play out
My inner drama geek l o v e d it
What I learned?
I needed a stronger GATEKEEPER
And that gatekeeper needed to not let anyone past, until they were a sure fire YES
(There are multiple gates & I’ll teach you think in my upcoming workshop *Calling In Your Ideal Partners x Lovers* on 5/29)
My flags might be different than your flags
I have my basic flags, my ‘you’re a good human’ flags
& then my...
Freedom of Expression means you get to change your mind
Mantra: it just keeps getting better
The other day, I led my 1:1 through a deep process on:
1 - finding clarity on her repeated patterns
2 - setting her up for success to ensure she didn’t…
3 - repeat these patterns again
4 - what to do & how to be in relationship with Self if & when they do repeat (they will, we’re chipping away layer by layer)
5 - jump from one relationship to the next without taking the necessary time to heal
Very similar to what I mapped out for you in the reel!
I can’t stress enough how important it is for you to sit with yourself during the interim to gain the necessary clarity to create something NEW x DIFFERENT - if that’s what you’re after ;)
Join us Saturday 5/29 for *****Calling In Your Ideal Partners x Lovers***** Workshop
I’ll be leading you through a potent 5 step process & a saucy sex magic ritual to make you magnetic for the right relationships for you!
Comment ‘more’ & I’ll send you the info
The $111 for the workshop...
When we go into relationships without being clear in who we are, what we want, or what we stand for, we leave a lot of room for things to get 𝙢𝙚𝙨𝙨𝙮!
We stretch ourselves into situations we don’t really want to be in (or ones we don’t feel 𝙨𝙖𝙛𝙚 in) & we tell ourselves we’re 𝘀𝘁𝗿𝗼𝗻𝗴 𝗲𝗻𝗼𝘂𝗴𝗵 to handle it anyway.
(I was the Queen of this!)
our hearts close,
& we feel like we’ve been taken advantage of.
(Watch my last IGTV for more on *how to stay open & protected*)
When the truth of it is, we never even set our boundaries in the first place.
We play the game of:
“Will they love me more if I sacrifice myself?”
“Will they give back everything I give them?”
“Will they see how much I care if I do this?”
“Will they stay if I chose them over me?”
We play coy with our boundaries, while internally, we are DYING for them to just GUESS it right.
We are setting them up for 𝘧𝘢𝘪𝘭𝘶𝘳𝘦
We are setting them up to be...