Re: TRIGGERS IN RELATIONSHIPS
Does it feel like you’re always critiquing your partner? Out loud or in your head?
Like no matter what they do you just keep finding something that bothers / frustrates you?
And they can feel it too?
***WATCH FOR HOW TO CHANGE THIS!***
Note: Triggers...they’re good. Great for healing. That’s when the real work in relationship begins.
I feel like most of us, are not actually w the ‘right’ people (and by right, I mean we tolerate behavior we shouldn’t) and because of this, EMOTIONAL REACTIONS happen (different than triggers) because it’s our Inner Being SCREAMING to get OUT.
P.S. Calling in your ideal partners & Lovers Workshop is Saturday! and LOVE SEX MEN opens for enrollment Saturday too info & sign up in bio
If you keep attracting the same kind of person over & over again in relationship but thought you did the work..
Know you DID do the work
The problem isn’t that the same person with a different face came into your life
It’s that you gave them your number
Every time I’ve said goodbye to a relationship, it’s felt like graduation day
Know the feel?
Except, when someone new would come in, they’d have the same qualities as the last one
It was always better...
but it was really just
‘same same but [a little] different’
If you’re looking for something different, you have to CHOOSE & DO different.
You DID & are DOING the work
Keep CHOOSING you & let go of familiar faces
There doesn’t always have to be a REASON the same person came in
*Calling In Your Ideal Partners & Lovers* Workshop happens SATURDAY!
This workshop will support you in becoming MAGNETIC to the relationships that are best for you while current...
Ladies! I know it’s REAL easy to bash the men in our lives & talk
...but it’ll never get us what we want
If the men we’re in relationship with act like boys & we don’t want to put up with the nonsense, we need to stop waiting for ‘the change’, & realize it’s not on us to support their process (i.e. be the coach, therapist, emotional regulator)
CARRYING them through the work is different than ACTIVATING their self awareness & growth.
There really are no exceptions.
Making change in relationship DOES boil down to you
...boundaries + knowing what you are & are NOT available for
A QUICKIE [PROCESS]
Make a list of:
1what you ARE available for
2what you ARE NOT available for
in your relationships.
Say goodbye to the ‘are not’ list & burn it, rip it, shred it - don’t save it for safe keeping
Take your ‘are’ list’ & reevaluate your relationships.
Anyone not make the cut? Set your...
Don’t forget to dance under the moon
I can’t wait for Womb Room (my seasonal moon circle offering!)
I’m taking an astrology course & just started a shaman program & it’s deepening my connection to the elements x seasons even more
Find me on Spotify @juliannevaccaro for my favorite music selections dance & dance 2 are on this frequency
My Relationship Dramas
I’m going to get straight to the point...
I grew up in a dangerously abusive household
My soul made it very clear from an early age, that I was here to unravel big generational patterns & evolve in the realm of relationships
These experiences triggered a series of abusive relationships
Three of which ended in court orders
& one being impregnated without consent
I was so dedicated to ‘the work’, that I stayed in each of those relationships way past their expiration
I kept thinking:
if I can just fix this, then it’ll end
if I can just be better, then he’ll stop
if I can show him I love him more, then he’ll see me
(Replicating my younger self with my caregivers)
It never worked
**I made their issues my issues, which was my issue**
This was a result of not wanting to feel the hurt & pain done to me from an early age
And a trauma response to those experiences
Out of ‘self protection’, I fawned (4th trauma response) &...
I met Paul in the beg of Jan when I decided I was 4ever more done w/ conventional monogamy
I entered the dating space this time w/ a completely diff intention & energy than times b4
I had just moved out of a darker season filled w/ purging x cleansing, but mostly, pulling all of me back in, to me
I sat in my Womb Room, just the week before, & completed a deep process around men, relationships, & love…
the same process I’ll take you through in **Calling In Your Ideal Partner/Lovers** this Sat
Except when I did it, my main intention wasn’t about calling in a partner, contrary to the times before
Instead, I decided to declare the things I would no longer accept in [any] relationship
I refined my no’s
I p*ssy dreamed a list of ideal qualities
Once again, doing it differently
I asked myself whether or not I’d rather be alone than be w/ a man that didn’t have these things
Most of my answers?
“Yes, I’d rather be alone.”
This was HUGE...
"It just keeps getting better! It really does! I'm having the best sex of my life. He goes down on me every time & makes my pleasure a priority & I fucking love it. I'm here for it! I've been making so much money at work. YES! Obviously, the pleasure and money go hand in hand. It's INSANE to see it all play out! It's been so divine, so pleasurable. I'm putting myself first . It's magic. Thank you for existing. Thank you for helping me unlock all of these things." - SJ
Receiving messages like these from my Goddess Embodied clients is everything
These women who get on my table are warrior goddesses who go deep into the shadows to come out on the other side.
It’s serious work! And serious play!
**The way you show up in the bedroom is the way you show up in every other area of your life**
The people around you learn how to treat you, your body & your yoni based off of how you treat yourself, body & yoni.
Trauma lives in the body.
Working with a bottom...
Decoupling the thing you want....
from the thing you *think* it will get you.
HOW TO DO THIS!
Whatever it is we want SO badly,
is wanted so badly,
because we THINK it’ll get us
**fill in the blank**
When we decouple the things we want from the FEELINGS we think they’ll bring, we:
1 start to feel GREAT
2 decrease the pressure x importance of the goal
3 which in turn, speeds up the manifestation process
EX (we almost always want TWO things - love &/or freedom)
Partner & family = unconditional LOVE & feelings of belonging
recognize you are unconditional love. it’s everywhere around you. let it in! find people that make you feel like you belong & BE in those moments. feel what it feels like to belong
Bigger biz & consistent clients = fulfillment & more money = FREEDOM
recognize a bigger biz doesn’t always mean more money! fulfillment doesn’t come from anything on the outside. find fulfillment from the inside, & start to feel what...
Ain’t nothing wrong with a tinder booty call except maybe when you know it’s not for your Highest Good
TIMES IT MIGHT BE SELF DESTRUCTIVE
Out of integrity
Filling a void
Looking for love in all the wrong places
Avoidance // distraction
Not ways wounds heal
Before any self judgement comes in or you feel triggered & think I’m the bad girl or try to justify the times you’ve done this
Be honest with yourself & know you’re here to evolve your soul & take the trigger as an invitation
If you’re in a cycle like this, I hope you know the love you deserve!
It’s SO big & wide & deep & beautiful
The time between where you are now & when you receive it, will probably be filled with many dark nights of the soul
And every single one of them will be worth it
For a step my step process to support yourSelf in ending the cycle, check out my reel about “unhappily jumping”
For a deeper...
Can I tell you a sacred secret?
Your p*ssy is the portal.
…to your creativity, intuition, knowing & wholeness.
Orgasms help you Remember.
Sex is a gateway to God/Spirit/Source.
Can I tell you another secret?
I created the 5 step process for the upcoming Calling In Your Ideal Partners & Lovers Workshop because well, if I’m being honest, I wanted a taste of everything out there :)
And I was DONE dating the same person with a different face.
& ALL of the erotic blueprints
And damn, sister...
I didn’t think it was gonna happen that fast.
But it did!
[Your p*ssy is also the portal to your magnetism]
ONE week til we gather for the workshop where we’ll purge, cleanse, get clear & s3x magic our way to the relationships we DESERVE & DESIRE
May 21, 2021