Staying In Your Body When Every Part Of You Wants To Run: Election Chaos

Yesterday I was on a group zoom call when someone raised their hand to speak. As soon as words started coming out of their mouth, my body tightened, & I instantly turned off my camera.

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It happened in the blink of an eye.

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And wasn’t a conscious thought.

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It was a reflex to shut something out that was 𝐮𝐧𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐭𝐚𝐛𝐥𝐞 & 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐟𝐫𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 to my system.

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I sensed tension in the group arise. I felt the start of what could have been a power struggle.

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What I saw, was the potential of two egos going at it for the sake of, well, ego.

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And in that moment, with just a few milliseconds to pass, I found myself ‘safely’ hidden, tucked behind my screen, unseen, & away from a perceived potential threat.

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Except, this wasn’t a real threat. Not one to put me in any real danger.

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And while I can say it had nothing to do with me, “it was between them, not me” — it had 𝙚𝙫𝙚𝙧𝙮𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙣𝙜 to do with me.

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The second our body wants to check out ‘cause things get hard, is the opening for deeper awareness & truth.

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It’s the [bitter]sweet space between.

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After a day like yesterday, our bodies most likely want to check out, if they aren’t already. And our egos want to create separation from the conflict, with a headline reading, “Between them not I.” Blame blame blame. Deflection. Cover up. Denial. Projection.

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But it’s what we need most right now, to stay in our bodies. To be present to the sensations. To notice what lives within us. To confront the parts of us we want to keep in the shadows. To expand our capacity for conflict & confrontation with a regulated nervous system.

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And to know this has everything to do with us.

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It’s where the growth 𝙨𝙩𝙖𝙧𝙩𝙨.

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So please, let’s keep our bodies in this.