Part 1- It's not about gender, it's about power

 

“I get how it could be hard for people to connect with you.“

 

“To drop in with you on a true, authentic level, this is going to be a part of the conversation.“

 

“Your energy is so raw, & it radiates through your aura.“

 

“I could see how some people are fearful to even come near you.”

 

I sat with a new friend & spoke deeply about sexuality, relationships, trauma, masc & fem, wounding between men x women, & our animalistic nature last night, as we watched the Costa Rican sunset ☀️

 

Her reflection of how she receives me, is feedback I’ve gotten 𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐫 & 𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐫

 

Lately, everywhere I’ve gone,

women have stopped me to tell me,

“you look so beautiful.”

 

On a waterfall in Montezuma as I skipped down the trails

 

A proud mother on a retreat as she gazed into my eyes

 

The whisper from a friend as I stepped out into the ocean

 

Those words have felt so different for me in various phases of my life

 

In this chapter, my heart is filled with warmth, as I let the beauty of what they see & feel sink in

 

To be seen, & genuinely, celebrated by women - not judged, manipulated, made wrong for my fullness - is still new for me

 

I’ve done deep dives into the places ‘𝗲𝗻𝘃𝘆’ has showed up in my journey these last few months...

 

as my coach named many abusive histories from mother to daughter stem from envy

 

My life has been filled with characters & stories, from both men x women, fearful of my power, starting in my early childhood

 

I’ve been beaten, exiled, abused, & shamed for my expression, from a young age, all the way into my adulthood

 

I recognized a few months ago, that I had been working on this piece with men for a long while, to come into another realization

 

...men are kind of easy,

it’s women that are hard.

 

But truthfully, it’s not about 𝗴𝗲𝗻𝗱𝗲𝗿 ❌

 

It’s about POWER

 

We see it. We fear it. We want to control it. Own it. Contain it. Ignore it. Disarm it.

 

We’ve made the 𝙧𝙖𝙬𝙣𝙚𝙨𝙨 of our 𝐚𝐧𝐢𝐦𝐚𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐜 𝐧𝐚𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐞 so wrong that we’ve tried to put it (ourselves) in a box⛓

 

Except our fear of power, beauty, money, sex, comes out 𝙨𝙞𝙙𝙚𝙬𝙖𝙮𝙨

 

We reject those that have it

And we reject the parts of ourselves that desire it

But all we 𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙡𝙡𝙮 want is to have a 𝘁𝗮𝘀𝘁𝗲

 

‘Cause fuck, it tastes GOOD😉💦