my journey with grief

"Grief feels like it will never pass. this brings us great fear. we worry that this house of sorrow will be our final resting place, that our days will always be overcast, gray, & dulled by the sadness we carry, we have the sense that we are on a slow walk with no obvious direction. Fortunately, grief knows where to take us;

we are on a pilgrimage to soul. " -Francis Weller

the first time i touched my grief was my abortion.

i had just moved to denver & finally left the abusive relationship that would be the start of the rest of my life.

i thought it was gonna be a bright, shiny fresh beginning.

but a few weeks later, i found myself with a positive pregnancy test, threats from my ex, & messages that he had planned it.

i laid on my brothers couch for 2 weeks. in stillness. pain. fear. confusion. sorrow. shame. grief. & loss.

…thinking i would never get out of it.

as the weeks went by, it became the catalyst to feel my deepest childhood wounds.

everything started to unravel.

& 6 months later..

i had my second initiation,

as i made my way through a somatic $exological healing program.

i journeyed through what felt like every memory of the past, filled with pain & sorrow.

it was a l o t of feeelings.

but eventually, not too far after,

everythingg started to change.

i was reborn. i was new. i was fresh. i was clean. i was clear. i was free. i was…happy.

..happier than i had ever been before.

freer…than i had ever experienced, but always knew was possible.

the thing that made ALL the difference between those 2 initiations was..

*how* i grieved

one..was by myself.

while the other..was WITH my chosen people.

wooooofffff, baby.

the love & healing from grieving in community was something i hadn’t expected to love so incredibly much.

it wasn’t something i expected to be so filling, so nourishing, so heart opening, so..

natural.

but here we are, years later..

teaching, bodyworker-ing, & coaching humans into the deepest darkest layers of their soul, to come out the other side centered in their heart & spirit

…ready to take on the world as the deliberate creator they are

𝐇𝐔𝐌𝐀𝐍

..is the first time i’m offering this kind of work outside of my 1:1 containers & IN THE FLESH

if you’ve been wanting to do somatic work with me, this is your in.

we start the first weekend of May.

message me for the link + info 💓2