i test positive for HSV-1

Nov 08, 2021

i test positive for HSV-1

& so does 2/3 of the population under 5 years of age

note: the statistics are often inaccurate when it comes to viruses:)

...because they can lay dormant & many of us are asymptomatic

it’s hard to know how i/we/any of us have contracted…bc viruses are tricky little things

but my story goes like this

i was rope tied…face down…w a man i deeply trusted to keep me safe in a dom/sub setting

however, in the heat of the moment, for whatever reason

he decided not to use a condom, going against all consent conversations

i was NOT aware

bc i was deep in subspace, w my face pressed into the bed

around a week later…i had my first outbreak & tested positive for HSV-1

i called this man, a deeply trusted figure in the Mens’ Coaching Space - a man that ‘stands’ for integrity, honesty & truth - a man that teaches consent, boundaries x kink

& asked

“did you use a condom?”
he said, “no”

i told him what happened

he told me he had HSV-1

but had only ever had oral outbreaks & didn’t think it was important to share before $exual interaction


i schooled him on HSV-1 x 2

that BOTH can show up AND be transmitted orally or genitally - regardless of how it shows up in YOUR body

i expressed how violated & hurt i felt

i mean really…..

a leader in this space who goes against consent?
a leader who doesn’t think it’s important to clean up their mistakes until confronted with the truth?


i’ve spent the last year x a half processing this event…owning my side…learning my lessons

when i shared this story & STI status with friends, nearly 75% came forward & said…


& then another 10% came forward over the following year to ask,

“how have you dealt with it?? bc now i’m +”

this is the start to a BIG CONVERSATION that needs to be had, & will be had on all of my platforms…especially @trppodcast

what i want you to know right now:

1️⃣you’re not alone or dirty
& you can still have the most epically, orga$mic $ex life

2️⃣as a coach & sexologist, i find it EXTREMELY important to share my status to show you there’s no shame

3️⃣i’d like to also personally invite you to a workshop i’m co-leading w my very integrous partner Paul

THIS SATURDAY called *Spiritual Women Navigating Spiritual Trash*

SWIPE for details - it’s IN PERSON & will be streamed so you can ZOOM in

dm me for the link…we’d love to have you!


50% Complete

Two Step

Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit, sed do eiusmod tempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua.