How to recover after a body violation-

I got felt up by a police officer when I went to pick up Paul at the airport in Costa Rica

He was seemingly there to help me navigate

Except he sandwiched himself between the car door & drivers seat as I tried to get out

He was trying to ask me about the tattoos on my arms but didn’t speak much English

I tried to be nice, smile to his like of my ink, & quickly gather my things so I could go find Paul

When I turned my head, his hands were all over my upper body touching my tattoos, from my neck to my hands

I flinched, tried to pull away & end communication

We were in the back corner of the garage with no one around

As I tried to get out, my leg tattoo peeked through the slit of my skirt

And before I knew it, he was feeling my upper thigh & the band wrapped around it

I pulled away again, managed to end the conversation, get out of the car, lock the doors & head to the arrivals area

A few weeks later I was in a store in Sedona, & Paul was waiting for me in the car

A married couple walked in & ran up to me to talk about my tattoos

As soon as I turned around to chat, the husband grabbed my arms & hands to touch the ‘incredible line work’

He continued to touch me, over & over throughout the conversation, as the wife stood by

In both scenarios,

I froze.

I didn’t say anything
I didn’t push them off

In fact,
I smiled
And said,
“Thank you”

No matter how many lectures x courses I teach or take on consent & boundaries

I’m reminded - I’m still learning

AND, I’m human

The human body does what it needs to do to stay SAFE when put in a dangerous situation

It’ll do what it thinks it NEEDS to do to PROTECT itself

In those moments, just a few from a record book of exchanges, it didn’t feel safe to do anything other than what I did

In my brain, I’d rather go down fighting…

I’d rather put myself in more danger than sacrifice my values or my body

But that wasn’t the response my body had

And I’m not mad at it

I once had a facilitator tell me,

“The more work you do, the less lag time they’ll be”

👇🏻👇🏻👇🏻👇🏻👇🏻

Watch here to find out how I recover.